Back to school...

It's back to school time again. I know this not because I'm a teacher, but because when I drive around town I no longer have to dodge kids on skateboards trying to run into my large blue North Korean BMW.

With everyone between 5-18 back to school and the college kids moving into dorms and heading back into their apartments, I think we should reflect back on what the purpose of a liberal arts education is.

While many have ideas on the purpose of education, the main purpose is to conform people into society.

It's not to educate. Test scores show that.

It's not to inspire. How many kids are trying to conquer the world these days? Alexander the Great took over the world by 18. Most 16 year olds don't know how to make their bed.

It's not to prepare. How does a few hours a week of a bunch of random subjects really prepare anyone for anything?

No. The purpose of education is to get people used to waking up early, get to their work place, have a lunch break, and then leave in the late afternoon. And for a few dads there are sports, but thats a whole other issue.

Should this be the purpose? Ehhh...maybe. Sure it would be great to think that kids all across America are learning to love math and English and history, but in reality what does a "love of" anything even accomplish?

As an English dude I realize that my degrees (B.A. and M.A.) in literature really don't amount to much outside of academia. It's not like people hear about my Masters Degree and shake in their boots or want to kiss my pinkie toe ring. In reality, loving literature or science or math or history simply doesn't pay the bills or afford the toys. DOING something with literature, science, math or history can pay the bills, but simply teaching people to love such things really doesn't accomplish much.   

So this upcoming school year, try not to just "love" what you are learning...but actually use your knowledge to be better and make the world better around you.

Is it still a blog if I'm not posting and the sadness of mama's boy nerds...

So I haven't posted in a while...mostly because I've been beyond busy...but that doesn't mean I still don't have a lot to say...haha...

This past weekend I was at the D23 Convention (pics coming soon...)

But a few thoughts about nerds.

While at D23, an expo celebrating the past, present, and future or Disney, I saw a man (boy) in his mid 20s waiting in line to meet John Lasseter. My friend had won a contest to meet him, and I was there with her while she waited in line. While there, we saw a man (boy) have his hair combed by his mother as he waited to meet the founder of Pixar.

Yep. A grown man (boy) had his mother, in public, comb his hair and brush it all around before he met John.

Guys...let me tell you right now: if your mom brushes your hair after 8 years old, you are not a man. You just aren't.

She can tell you to comb your hair, but she shouldn't really go beyond that. Here are a few things that by 20 you should be able to do without mommy:

1. Wash your hair
2. Bathe
3. Pack a lunch
4. Date
5. Talk to a girl
6. Talk to your boss
7. Go to the bathroom alone
8. Have a Facebook without giving mom the password
9. Drive anywhere
10. Breathe

Here are a few things your mom is allowed to do for you when you are in your twenties:

1. Make you dinner - this is cool because most men can't even make toast

2. That's about it.

So let's try to grow up gentleman...


 

Is Tom Hanks a saint?

I love Tom Hanks.

Ever since his Busom Buddy days.

But when I read stories like this, I just have to wonder if he's a secular saint?

Now here is my challenge to you.

If you made a piece of art, and people didn't like it, and in fact people spent money to see it, would you give them their money back?

Can you be happy?

Watch this video...NOW! Those who know me know how much I admire Dennis Prager...

Friends, Lovers, and Spouses...

I recently had a conversation with a friend about people we know who go back to the people in their lives who hurt them. The list below is made up of of the usual suspects.

Ex-boyfriends.

Ex-girlfriends.

Ex-wives.

Ex-husbands.

Ex-friends.

Ex-Ex-Ex's.


From the outside looking in we tend to think of this as lunacy. Why go back to the one who caused the pain that drove you away to begin with?

Many times people go back to the people who stopped calling back, who cheated, who used them, who took their youth, who stole their innocence, who owe them money, or who just down right treated them like a low down dirty dog.  

Sure there are numerous pschological reasons behind this. Freud would have blamed your mother.

But allow me throw another idea out there. We don't run back to those who hurt us or used us or ignored us because of some deep rooted need to be accepted by those who become indifferent toward us. We run back because, sadly, that's our circle of friends.

We chose most of our friends, lovers, and spouses not on anything truly deep, but because of geographical limitations. It's hard to go to the movies with a friend who lives in Texas while you live in Southern California. 

So we have a group that gets presented before us based on a few random choices. 

We select our friends, lovers, and spouses because they live in or near our city, because they go to our church, work in our office, joined the local book club, or went to our high school or college. You find at least one thing you have in common and the relationship blasts off or putters. 

Maybe the one thing that started that relationship was the sharing of a similiar interest. 

Music.

Baseball.

God.

Seinfeld.

Working Out.

...or for those who are honest...sex. You just wanted to hook up and they left you out to hang on a limb. 

But at the heart of most of this is just simply the idea that they are close by and do the things mentioned above. So you toss aside your heart. You abandon logic. You kiss reason goodbye. You just settle for a person because they are "here" as opposed to whoever is out "there."

In reality, your best friend or future spouse lives 300 miles away, and you just haven't met them yet. But because we live in a TV World, we assume that the only people ment for me are the ones thrusted before me. In the world of TV, characters are friends because of those factors listed above.

They aren't friends because of values.

They aren't friends because of the deep conversations they share.

They are friends because the script calls for them to be. 

But life is not a TV show. We don't have to go back to those who hurt us because they are in our circle of friends and lovers. 

Instead of looking simply at the world in front of you, why not look at the world around you?

     

  

  

Trailer Alert!

Here is the trailer to 50/50. Just Watch. It looks amazing...

Are you Cereal?

What ever happened to all the great cereal commercials of my youth?

I was a child of the 1980s. That's right. I'm kind of old. Like "I'm an adult" old, not like, "please turn the music down" old.

Back to the 1980s cereal TV icons.

Was there anyone cooler than Sugar Bear? He was so laid back while others tried to steal his breakfast...never sweat'n a beat. What a good example. Even though he may have experimented with herbal concoctions; but I don't judge unsaved cartoon characters. 

Now compare him to the Trix Rabbit, who obviously has issues far beyond Trix cereal. His over reaction concerning not getting a bowl of cereal really comes across as rather pathetic and needy. And there is a huge inconsistency in the Trix Rabbit world, as he obviously dwells in the same universe as us, so why doesn't he just go to Vons and buy some cereal for himself? I find it hard to believe he doesn't have at least $3.50.

While I can buy the idea a cartoon rabbit bought a trench coat and hat, I find it silly that he can't afford a stupid box of cereal. And why didn't he just use his wardrobe money to just buy the Trix box to begin with? This really frustrates me to no end.

But even he was much better than the crap they are throwing at us today. For instance, this creepy commercial for Carmel Nut Crunch Cereal (BTW: I'm not even touching on this dumb name) has replaced the colorful unison of animation and purpose with slacker delight. No longer are the TV icons of my youth on, nor are there any icons with a direct agenda. At least Sugar Bear and the Trix Rabbit were after something or protecting something. These live action folks are passively sitting by eating cereal as the world around them judges their incompetent attitude:

What is the point here? That if I munch on Carmel Nut Crunch I'm going to creep out my pretty co-workers and infuriate my boss and potentially get fired?! I think I'll pass.

If only 1990 never had to come with it's sucky Nirvana attitude that promoted self loathing and isolation.

Choices...(Why write when others much smarter have already put down in words what I could only hope to express)

The Road Not Taken

by Robert Frost

TWO roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;	5
Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim,
Because it was grassy and wanted wear;
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,	10
And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way,
I doubted if I should ever come back.	15
I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I—
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.	20

Great Quotes...

Here are two quotes that have just been in my head all day...and an amazing song to accompany them...

How do you pick up the threads of an old life?
How do you go on when in your heart you begin to understand there is no going back?

There are some things that time cannot mend, some hurts that go too deep that have taken hold...You have so much to enjoy and to be and to do. Your part in the story will go on...
~Frodo Baggins

I’m old, Gandalf. I know I don’t look it, but I’m beginning to feel it in my heart. I feel…thin. Sort of stretched, like…butter scraped over too much bread. I need a holiday. A very long holiday. And I don’t expect I shall return. In fact I mean not to.

~ Bilbo Baggins

Modern Detention

One of my favorite films of all time is The Breakfast Club.

For those of you too young to know about it or too old that you forgot, it's about a group of teenagers with nothing in common who get Saturday detention for numerous reasons and form friendships because of their one day spent together.

John Hughes' film is funny, smart, poignant, and real. It takes place mostly in one large library the entire time. And Judd Nelson plays one of cinema's all time great rebels. It's the 1980s version of James Dean.

So as I sit in the DMV right now, I can't help but think of this arm pit of depression as detention for adults.

No one wants to be here. Not the drivers. Nor the workers. No one is smiling. No one is happy. And while there are lots of reasons we could be sharing in the misery of the DMV, most people are here to pay fees or clear up issues or deal with some small minute issue. No one is here because they won a prize and need to claim their winnings.

So this gets me thinking. There are lots of other modern forms of detention purgatory for adults:

Church - look around next time, there are a lot of people who don't want to be there. I love my church, but let's be honest, for those following the Pope, being Catholic means always having to say you're guilty.

Family BBQ's - see above.

Disneyland - This is mostly a father thing. I really don't see a lot of happy dads in the OC. But if you just spent $1,000 to wait in line all day for a three minute ride and overpriced fried food, you might be miserable too.

Work - if I have to explain this to you, then either you don't work or you work at Google.

But my favorite modern form of detention for adults is Driver's Training School. Especially Comedy Driver's Training School. I haven't been there for a few years, but I can remember the horrific 8 hour day.

For those who haven't gone through the torture of Driver's Traning School, let me explain.

It's usually ran by a 103 year old man named Simon, Saul or Claude. He sits on a stool for 8 hours asking people basic questions about drivng safety and showing bad Dateline NBC news specials about drunk driving.

Halfway through we get a one hour lunch. If you are late by a few minutes you are tossed out and asked to return another day. I once watched an argument get pretty heated.

Then at the end you get Claude or Saul or Simon to sign this stupid little form and then you don't have the ticket on your record. But the real joy of the day is realizing that you are among a group of idiots that give imbreeding a bad name. It's a bad group. And the comments they have and the questions they ask! Oh. My. God.

"Is it illegal to pee in your car in a bottle?"

"Is 75 miles per hour speeding if the limit is 65?"

"But my dog won't sit still unless he's on my lap."
    
"Can we leave an hour early? I got stuff to do."

"But the right of way should go to the person with the busiest schedule."

"So what if my license is expired, I'm not."

It's pure torture...
 
I always thought the Breakfast Club should have had a sequel. And it should take place at Driver's Training School on a Saturday. And their principal, Mr. Vernon, should teach the class to the same group who he had back when they were in high school.

Ya. I think that should happen...

The 405

I've been driving the 405 all week into Palos Verdes. I'm participating in an AP English Teaching conference. I'll write about that in another blog.

From my apartment, it takes an hour and a half to arrive at the high school and then two hours to get home.

This has been my view:

Yep.



I leave my place at 6:00am and leave the school around 4:00pm. And in between I'm perfecting my craft as an educator. But the traffic is just so evil. So stinkin' evil. Like Rosie O'Donnell in a bikini evil. 

Ya. Try not to think about that. 

While sitting in my car, I've noticed a lot of the same cars driving along side with me. Which has me assuming that this is their daily commute. Which has me want to cry for them. But if I started crying in the car, then I'd fog up my glasses and hit the car in front of me. And then I'd really have something to cry about because I don't have the best car insurance. 

So I just listen to talk radio, Jars of Clay, and Van Morrison. I find not thinking about the evil around me and focusing on the pleasures of voices less grating than mine is a much easier way to commute.   

My Charlie Brown Obsession

I love Charlie Brown.

Let me rephrase that. I love the comic strip Peanuts.

It's one of the great pieces of philosophical pop culture. Charles Schulz created an amazing cast of characters to embody the subconscious of our childhood. The Know-It-All. The Smart kid. The Little Sister. The Tom Boy. The Follower. The Smelly Kid. The Wise Old Dog. They all exist in the world of Charlie Brown.

What makes the strip work is that is was poignant and funny all at the same time.

But I think what I really loved about Peanuts was how Schulz wasn't afraid to make an insecure, lonely,  lost, introspective, always means well protagonist who never wins and doubts himself, especially in the areas of the opposite sex. But he keeps on truck'n!

 
 
Most kids shows or comics have a confident main character who we know will eventually get the girl or save the day. But not Charlie Brown. He was the original George Costanza.

Growing up, I always saw myself as these two characters. Unsure. Terrible with women. Bad at sports.

While many see that as "sad" I would argue that many are just afraid to look at the darker parts of their personality or character. But if we don't acknowledge our weaknesses, how can we change? How can we aspire to greater things?

Not that I'm any better or worse today in those areas, but through these characters created by very smart men (Larry David of Seinfeld and Schulz), I'm able to see the truth within me and fight the urge to just embrace my weaknesses and continue forward, looking for ways to be better than I was yesterday. They become reality mirrors that I must face to become the best version of Paul Moomjean I can be.

That's what popular culture should do.

And Schulz agrees with me, I think. On a radio special about the man, the host commented:

Charles Schulz said he saw himself in some of his characters. He recognized himself in Charlie Brown's continued failures. In Snoopy's humor. In Lucy's moments of anger. And in the insecure feelings of Linus. Some of the situations in "Peanuts" seem to have developed from Mister Schulz's own life experiences.

So maybe seeing ourselves in another's creation is the ultimate complement we could give them.

To Be or Not to Be...

After a week of no Facebook I've had a few interesting encounters.

First, I've gotten some support via email from people I haven't talked to in a while. So that means my "experiment" worked in some sort of theory.

Second, I've found out most people LOVE their Facebook and don't ever want to give it up.

Third, I've really enjoyed not knowing what's going on all the time. It's given me a lot of time to do other things I've been neglecting.

So where do I go now?

Well, in a dream world I'd snap the cell phone.

That's right. I think I want to go email only. That's primarily because my editor requires an emailed copy of my articles, and I suppose there must some way to get in contact with me.

Here's the thing. I text and others don't text back or they text back 10 hours later. They call and I'm too busy to pick up. Or they text and I don't know what in the freakin' world to write back. Or they call and I don't want to talk. Am I allowed to not want to talk or text or respond? Maybe I'm tired. Maybe I'm reading my Bible. Maybe I'm at a movie. Maybe I'm listening to Van Morrison or Cat Stevens.

Now, what if someone wanted to get in touch with me then? paulmoomjean@yahoo.com works still.

My life is filled with so many things already. And if I choose to spend my time with you, you should feel honored to know that instead of doing nothing, I'd rather be with you.

Here are things I'm already committed to:
Bible study at the retirement home, writing articles, teaching at Eternity Bible College, Wednesday night dinners with my buddy and wrestlers, Community/Men's Group on Thursdays, football games or wrestling duals, Sunday school, ushering, church, and Sunday dinner with friends. That's not including work.

In between is my Doctor Conkey's sit on my stool and rant and rave time, Panera Bread writing time, gym time, short film making time, short film writing time, blogging, reading, cigar and tobacco pipe time, watching movies, personal Bible study time, and sleep. That's not including breakfast, lunch, and dinner.

Then there is just talking, meeting, and problem solving with friends and family.
So here's the deal I made with myself and my buddy Landon...if I ever make a lot of money or win some ridiculous lottery prize, I'm getting rid of the cell. I really wouldn't mind it. It would be such a relief.

My theory is if I'm really rich, most people would search me out and find me eventually. Or if you really wanted to hang, we'd make it happen.

In fact, scratch the rich part. Maybe I'll get rid of the cell in 2012.

Ya.

That sounds awesome.

Why I love The Onion

If you enjoy laughing you should really bookmark The Onion.

The satirical newspaper that prints fake news might be the closest thing we will ever get to Jonathon Swift.

Recently, The Onion wrote news stories about a couple wanting to get marriage therapy, a random trip to Best Buy, and a job spotted in Iowa.   

But my favorite story of all involves non-name brand cereal.

I did my part and directed you to The Onion. It's your job to just enjoy.

.

Everything is Everything

Have you ever asked yourself

how you spend your time?

What makes up your day?

Do you even have a plan on

how to execute your goals,

dreams, and wishes?

Or do you just wait...

Or even worse...do you waste your time with sleep and pleasure and foolishness like the sluggard in Proverbs?

You see, everything you do creates the purpose in your life. Everything is everything. What I mean is that whatever you do, you are creating the next opportunity in your life. The "reap what you sow" philosophy applies in that when you sow foolishness you reap foolishness. When you sow into bad relationships, bad friendships, bad choices, bad jobs, and bad habits, you produce more of those things.

If your goal is to simply exist and make "the best" of your current situation, you aren't really living. You are existing. You know what else simply "exists"?

Rocks.     

Carrots.

Spoons.

Kim Kardashian.

I could go on.

They serve some purpose, but in reality, they aren't living. They are simply here.

That's right. I just compared Kim Kardashian to carrots, spoons, and rocks. 

And before you get upset at me because you actually see value in rocks, carrots, and spoons, let me explain in greater detail what I mean.

People were never meant to simply exist. Everything on this planet was given to man to take care of. In fact, we are not really supposed to be concerned with ourselves, but with the well being of others. (Philippians 2:3) 

This is why the story of Noah is so awesome. God gets weary of mankind and decides to start over with Noah and his family. Why? Here's why...

The LORD saw that the wickedness of man was great in the earth, and that every intention of the thoughts of his heart was only evil continually. ⁶And the LORD was sorry that he had made man on the earth, and it grieved him to his heart. ⁷So the LORD said, "I will blot out man whom I have created from the face of the land, man and animals and creeping things and birds of the heavens, for I am sorry that I have made them." (Genesis 6:5-7)

Man was never meant to just be. We are supposed to do good and be good. God saw that evil was destroying man's potential, and that man had become his own worst enemy, so God eliminated those who weren't making life better and kept one man and his family who were.

Ask yourself this question. Be honest. If you were alive in Noah's time, would God have had you board the ark?

Or are you just waisting everyone's time?

 
 
   

Sometimes I just want to...

I once made a joke to a friend about a friend who caused non stop chaos everywhere she went. I said, "Well you know, life isn't for everyone." That got a good "shock" laugh. 

Not that I wanted her to die. It's just that life can be very hard and things don't always go as planned. And some people can't handle it.

Part of the problem is that everyone has an agenda for you. Your mom. Your dad. Your boss. Your friends. Your wife. Your husband. Your co-workers. Your family. Your dog. Everyone has this agenda that they want you to follow. Because it will make their life easier.

But what about you? Is that you were made for? For other people's comfort?

It's so funny how people will ask you to follow them into the dark, but you ask them to follow you in the light, and suddenly you're the jerk and they don't have time. It's as if they know all the demands they put on others and the stress it causes and they don't want to become what they require of others.

Listen, I believe in helping people, but I don't believe in being people's puppets. There is a difference and wisdom is needed to discern.

Not that other people's agenda for you is always bad. It's just...people suck sometimes. They don't really think about anyone but themselves, and in their arrogance they believe they know how to live your life better than you. And when they believe you are the ticket to their dreams, they will exploit you until the sun has set. 

Of course, what do you do? You can't stop being part of this great experiment known as life.

Sometimes I think about just sailing away. Buying a boat and going anywhere I want. Because then no one would be able to force their agenda on me, whether it be positive or negative.    

Of course I'd have to learn how to handle a boat. And I'd have to be able to buy a boat. And that ain't happening soon. But the idea of just sailing away sounds amazing.

Me vs. Nature. Fighting the current. Searching for places across the Pacific. Just sail away.

Ya.

What if God had a blog?

Obviously God does have a blog. It's called the Bible. He hasn't updated it for a while, nor does He need to.

But what if God had a modern blog?

Like mine. Or someone's much better, like Steve from The Sneeze.

The New Yorker published TV writer Paul Simms satirical piece this week seeing what would happen if you, me, and everyone we know could respond to God's blog.

I think my favorite "comment" is: Putting boobs on the woman is sexist.

If God wrote a blog, do you think you would write anything? Ask any questions? Make comments? Here's your chance...what would you ask or write?

Life in Reverse

I'm going through a huge transitional period right now.

I'm leaving corporate America as a marketing/sales guy at ITT Technical Institute and am going back into teaching.

In fact, next week I'll be going to

an AP English clinic to

learn how to be a better

teacher before the Fall semester starts.

I also got an amazing opportunity

teaching at the college level

for Eternity Bible College in

Simi Valley, CA.

Looks like I'm going to be

able to use that Masters in

English after all.

But as I approach 30 and watch my life go forward, my temptation is to make sense of it in reverse.

Ironically, that's how we actually do make sense of our lives, right? In the moment of living we aren't sure what's happening. We just sort of live it. Then we reach the breaking point or 'the end' of a situation and try to rationalize it through self analysis. We are convinced that best way to figure out where we are headed is to look at where we've been.

But then I come across Luke 9:62

Jesus replied, “No one who puts his hand to the plow and looks back is fit for service in the kingdom of God.”

So maybe looking at life in reverse isn't the best way. Maybe life is meant to be lived forward and the past is simply that. What a wonderful philosophy, no? How freeing. We don't have to live in regret. We don't have to think our best days are behind us. We don't have to wonder if anyone noticed. We just simply move on.

How often we try to make sense of everything. Then we apply external meaning to an internal conflict. When in fact, maybe there was no particular reason for what happened in our past, with the exception being that it happened because God willed it, and we will never understand why. So while living life, try not to look back and ask "why?" but instead to move ahead and ask "what now?"

   

The Kern River almost killed me and I almost killed Steve Lawson

So we all have summers we won't forget.

For me it was the summer of 2008. I was unemployeed. I had no idea what God wanted me to do. But I had just made a crap load of money due to an employer letting me leave early from a job. And I wanted to take on life. Not everything was so bad.

In June, I went to a screenwriting convention with my buddy Jeb and had the opportunity to meet with junior executives from all over Hollywood. Then in July I went on a trip throughout the southwest. I traveled the Grand Canyon...

And I visited Bedrock City...the home of Fred Flintstone...

...and that was by far the high point of my journey...




I traveled throughout Utah, New Mexico, Colorado, Arizona, and Nevada.

I slept in the smallest town in Utah (Green River), met a New Mexico Hooters waitress who shared mutual friends with me in Santa Barbara, visited the Olympic Training Center, got lost on a highway that didn't have any clear lefts, rights, or directions, and ended the trip in Las Vegas, where I figured out I had a gambling problem...

Upon my return home I was offered a free trip to go white water rafting on the Kern River with wrestling coach friend of mine, Steve Lawson. Steve is one of the most accomplished wrestlers in California history. He was a National Champion in Greco Roman wrestling, won a state championship, won three Southern Section Masters Championships, and was a high school All American.

He also likes to buy me lunch

and breakfast a lot, and that's

the greatest aspect of his character.

  




So when he invited me and our buddy Gerardo to get in a raft and hit the Kern, I figured, what would be a better way to end the summer than do an exciting outdoor activity...

...of course I should have been a tad more worried after reading this sign posted before entering the wilderness of the Kern River...

That's right! 257 dead!

And I was almost 258 twice...

First, I found out the hard way I couldn't swim when the guide told me to jump in the water. That was a stupid mistake. Then when the boat flipped, I was given the blame. But when you're short and fat, everyone blames you for everything. No one blames tall people. Probably because you will need them later to grab stuff down from tall places.

Steve blames me. (Well not really, but that's the way the story is told.)

I still blame the little junior high boy who was a friend of Steve's son...but as a Man, I can't do that. So I'll take the rap...and the entire wrestling community has embraced my near death encounter by having me retell the story at every tournament I go to...

So there you go.

The Summer of '08.

Sadly, no summer since has compared...though this July I did get to go to Disneyland and see Captain America...but it's not quite like nearly dying in the middle of nowhere and while traveling the southwest fighting the weather as the storms, rain, and lightening tried to take my life from me...

Which brings me to my greater point. When do we feel more alive? When we are safe? When things are predictable? Or when we are on the edge?

When we are living, of course! Walking by faith and not by sight. When we see our lives flash before our eyes and the potential for disaster is hovering above like a vulture looking for the kill. That's when we feel like life is so real we could cut it with a butter knife.

So maybe that's why the last few summers have been so dull. I guess you aren't really living unless you are fighting off death. Ironic, huh? 

I miss Cat Stevens...

Why I dropped Facebook (and threw away my watch and don't pick up my phone) PART 2

Day 1.5 in a post Facebook world.

Last night was kind of cool. I came home after dinner with good friends and didn't check to see what everyone was doing. I assumed if they wanted me to know they would have called me, text me, or emailed me.

This brings me to my next reason on why I dropped Facebook. I believe it is unhealthy to know what is going on in everyone's life 24/7. Who am I, God? No, I'm not. God already filled the position of being God. I'm Paul. It's a humble position, and no one else wants it, but it's my job, and I'm keeping it until God says so.

Even if it's really awesome (you got a new job, you're getting married, you liked the movie Tree of Life -- even though no one really liked that piece of crap) I really shouldn't have access to all that info. I shouldn't really be able to follow your life through pictures. I should make an effort to call you or hang out with you or visit you at work or invite you my place for dinner or meet for lunch or if I see you at Target, buy you a soft pretzel and let you tell me about you.

And then there is the concept of butting into every conversation. Which I'm as guilty as any, by the way. As if my opinion or idea is worthy of being on your page so that your 500 other friends can see what I think.

On top of all of that, it was becoming depressing to watch people I care about post questions on a general forum and watch the bad advice come spewing in like rivers of dung. I mean just HORRIBLE HORRIBLE advice, and if I posted a response countering it, then I would have been labeled an ass. So out of sight, out of mind, I suppose. I have to remember that it's not my job to fix everything. Not everyone is like this, as some people don't give a hill of beans about anything. But it's my issue and I'm working on it.     

What I also found was that Facebook makes everything so much more impersonal than it ever should be. And since I can send a message out into the world about my vacation and post a few pictures up in the photos section, I found myself less connected to people because I no longer would call them about what's going on in my life or asking them what's going on in theirs. Instead, the "news feed" pops up and now I feel like I got my "Jim time" or "Cindy fix." On a side note, I don't believe I have any friends named Jim or Cindy. But had I put "Adam" or "Katie" then those people might have thought I canceled Facebook because of them.    

Oh...I must address an issue that must be addressed. :)

I have been told that keeping a blog is contradictory in my original thesis concerning online social networking. While I understand it on face value, I do believe that well thought out essays or thematic blogs are different from 12 word status updates. And as a writer, this blog allows me the opportunity to write in a more progressive and detailed manner, when I'm not complaining about my neighbor's rooster. Ha!

But if you still believe I'm picking and choosing, then let me direct you to this famous quote by Walt Whitman:  "Do I contradict myself? Very well, then I contradict myself, I am large, I contain multitudes." I agree.

The last point I want to address was brought up by a writer friend of mind who mentioned that he uses Facebook to see what is nephew is doing across the country and promote his writing. That's fantastic, but when you really start to think about it, why do I really need to know what's going on with my family unless I'm interacting with it? Unless we use information to grow the relationship, then really that information is of no true value to us.

For the majority of human history nobody knew what anyone was doing and they found a way to survive. In 1865 you, the wife and kids lived in Arizona and your other brother lived in New York with his kids, and maybe you visited or wrote a letter and everyone still figured out how to get everything done. So I'm not buying this "I have a Facebook so I can see what my Aunt Edna is doing with her time." If you love Edna...call her or better yet, visit.

I know I'm coming off very judgemental. That's not my point at all. I just think I'm seeing a trend and I want to stop it in me before it eats away at my soul. So it's a personal choice. But a choice I'm beginning to agree with more and more.

On that note...Cat Stevens!